Thursday, March 28, 2013

Fame and For-tune

Girl Sitting On Her Own Tucked Feet: "I just don't understand the motivation, do you get me?  Everything just seems so forced and followed these days, and I just can't get behind it."

Guy Who Talks: "Oh, I totally get it.  It's just one thing followed by another.  It's like no one even has any original ideas anymore.  Like that 'Actresses Without Teeth' Tumblr?  I used to black out model's teeth in my mom's magazines.  And now that's what people are following and calling art all of a sudden?"

Guy Who Talks' Boyfriend (Who Doesn't Talk): (smiles)

Guy Who Talks: "I mean, right?"

Girl Sitting On her Own Tucked Feet: "I don't even know what that is, but I refuse to get on social media and networking sites because I think it's a drain of my creative space.  Have you guys seen 'The Weather Man'?  With Nicholas Cage?  It's like, everyone hates the weather man, and that's how I feel about social media.  Like social media is the weather man, and it's telling us stuff I don't want to hear anymore."

Guy Who Talks' Boyfriend (Who Doesn't Talk): (nods head back and smiles)

Whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaat are these idiots talking about?

Am I truly with someone who would engage in conversation with this moronic, post-teen wretch?!  Did she really just ask if we'd seen "The Weather Man"?  The fucking Weather Man?!  From 2005?  Does she know Nicholas Cage is the worst, constantly stage-whispering actor alive, and that watching that movie is, in itself, a drain of creative space?!

I am fucking speechless.

All I can do is laugh.  I can't even say anything.  Not a goddamned thing.

And what moronic shit-eater thinks that he has any right to be criticizing someone's Tumblr success?  Do Tumblr follows and shares equal fame and for-tune now?  If I have a heavily viewed Tumblr account, does that mean I'll have rail-thin, hot men lining up to switch-bottom for me?  Shouldn't everyone be happy that something as simple as blacking out bitches' teeth is still funny and relatable, even in this technological age?  I mean, I used to cross out and change words in newspaper articles with my brother's blindly given suggestions, but you don't see me suing MadLibs.

I say, good for them.  Good.  For.  Them.  The people who made that shit (don't ask me their names, because I do not know them, and neither do any of you) are having fun, and that shit is real funny.  If I could work a Photoshop, I would've done something like that years ago.  But I didn't have the idea; they did.  And I can't work a Photoshop.  Good.  For.  Them.

I can't even speak.  Nicholas Fucking Cage.  My god.

I have to get off this train.

I'm just saying...you really need to watch out for people these days.  You start dating a graduate-level finger painter, and this is the type of shit that's in store for you.

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