Girl Sitting On Her Own Tucked Feet: "I just don't understand the motivation, do you get me? Everything just seems so forced and followed these days, and I just can't get behind it."
Guy Who Talks: "Oh, I totally get it. It's just one thing followed by another. It's like no one even has any original ideas anymore. Like that 'Actresses Without Teeth' Tumblr? I used to black out model's teeth in my mom's magazines. And now that's what people are following and calling art all of a sudden?"
Guy Who Talks' Boyfriend (Who Doesn't Talk): (smiles)
Guy Who Talks: "I mean, right?"
Girl Sitting On her Own Tucked Feet: "I don't even know what that is, but I refuse to get on social media and networking sites because I think it's a drain of my creative space. Have you guys seen 'The Weather Man'? With Nicholas Cage? It's like, everyone hates the weather man, and that's how I feel about social media. Like social media is the weather man, and it's telling us stuff I don't want to hear anymore."
Guy Who Talks' Boyfriend (Who Doesn't Talk): (nods head back and smiles)
Whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaat are these idiots talking about?
Am I truly with someone who would engage in conversation with this moronic, post-teen wretch?! Did she really just ask if we'd seen "The Weather Man"? The fucking Weather Man?! From 2005? Does she know Nicholas Cage is the worst, constantly stage-whispering actor alive, and that watching that movie is, in itself, a drain of creative space?!
I am fucking speechless.
All I can do is laugh. I can't even say anything. Not a goddamned thing.
And what moronic shit-eater thinks that he has any right to be criticizing someone's Tumblr success? Do Tumblr follows and shares equal fame and for-tune now? If I have a heavily viewed Tumblr account, does that mean I'll have rail-thin, hot men lining up to switch-bottom for me? Shouldn't everyone be happy that something as simple as blacking out bitches' teeth is still funny and relatable, even in this technological age? I mean, I used to cross out and change words in newspaper articles with my brother's blindly given suggestions, but you don't see me suing MadLibs.
I say, good for them. Good. For. Them. The people who made that shit (don't ask me their names, because I do not know them, and neither do any of you) are having fun, and that shit is real funny. If I could work a Photoshop, I would've done something like that years ago. But I didn't have the idea; they did. And I can't work a Photoshop. Good. For. Them.
I can't even speak. Nicholas Fucking Cage. My god.
I have to get off this train.
I'm just saying...you really need to watch out for people these days. You start dating a graduate-level finger painter, and this is the type of shit that's in store for you.